If you go down to the woods today

February 5th, 2010
Engrossed in 3D at IMax

Engrossed in 3D at IMax

I didn’t want to like Avatar too much. It’s the most expensive movie ever made, costing around $280 million to make and another $150 million to hype, and that’s enough reason to give it a wide berth. Besides Avatar is supposed to be pitched against a much smaller, cheaper British film in the race for the Oscars: An Education. The smaller film is set in the unswinging early-Sixties London and by most accounts a more nuanced effort – less crash bang whallop and much more my sort of thing really. Still, I was curious about this movie-phenomenon.

Part of the attraction of Avatar was finally getting to go to an IMAX cinema and to see a film in 3D. I’d never been to either and had this idea that the IMAX are the cinematic equivalent of the Alps with screens that tower into the clouds and leave the cinema-goer dumbstruck and overwhelmed. Unfortunately the Greenwich Odeon screen didn’t seem very big at all. Perhaps it was an IMIN.

It turns out that the movie is pretty engrossing. The hero, Jake Sully, played by Sam Worthington, is a paraplegic ex-marine who is drafted in to the Avatar programme on the moon Pandora. This involves having his consciousness ported into the body of one of the tall, blue inhabitants of this jungle-covered planet. It’s a sort of a slightly less naff World of Warcraft. The humans are mining the planet for the precious mineral Unobtainium (an amusing name for a mineral that I assumed was original, but according to its wiki page has been around since the fifties). They want Jake to ingratiate himself into a village of blue-skins and persuade its inhabitants to move away so an open-cast mine can be ripped out of paradise.

The contrast between the unspoiled Eden of the handsome Na’vi aliens and the thuggish humans is the key theme of the film. However it has a lot more going on than that, and the movie throws out a relentless barrage of cranky ideas and motifs taken from other films. One of these familiar ideas is of virtual reality, entering another mind or world that has been used in films like Existenz, Total Recall and Strange Days. As in Existenz where players of the Existenz game have to plug in the gaming device into their bodies, the Na’vi connect their pony-tails to plants and animals. This enables them to commune with non-human intelligence – they grok each other – an idea found in Robert Heinlein’s classic Sci-Fi novel Stranger in a Strange Land.

There are bits of Star Wars, fragments of 2001, and possibly even a dollop of Flash Gordon. However, all this isn’t too obvious, it doesn’t weigh the movie down too much. James Cameron handles his sources like a mainstream Quentin Tarantino and creates something fresh and exciting. The 3D takes it into a new realm of cinematic experience and also isn’t too in your face. Before the film started, we were shown a trailer for a film about the Hubble telescope where the satellite was jutting out of the screen, but in Avatar the technology is mostly used to give the characters and landscapes greater depth.

Some of it’s pretty trippy -  at night the forest turns into a neon-lit, sub-aquatic day-glo rave. All beings on the planet form a vast intelligent neural network – similar to Terence McKenna and Paul Stamets‘ ideas about mushrooms. Some bloggers have even noticed that the blue Na’vi resemble the elf-people you’re meant to see after taking the hallucinogenic Ayahuasca vine from the Amazon. The natives live in a vast, ancient tree whose branches and roots are seen on the computers at the human’s base looking like the Norse tree at the centre of life Yggdrasil.

The most glaringly obvious thing about this film is its anti-colonialism. You can see Avatar as Zulu in reverse, with the Zulus surrounded by the Brits. Or is that The Emerald Forest, where a young man ‘gone native’ joins a fight to save the rain forest from earth moving equipment using only stone-age weapons. I wonder if this is what has contributed to the film’s international success, now that occupation by foreign powers is on the agenda again. Lawrence of Arabia wrote in a letter: “We are calling them [the arabs] to fight for us on a lie, and I can’t stand it.” Luckily, Jake Sully finds a way out. Although I expect Avatar will win more statues than An Education at the Academy Awards, I don’t suppose Cameron would mind if he was trounced by the little guys.

Office Angst

February 2nd, 2010
Not all smiles

Not all smiles

At work I sit at my desk with my headphones on, sometimes listening to last night’s Late Junction and sometimes with no sound at all. That might explain the how I didn’t quite catch what was going on, at least I don’t think it was an aural Rorschach test.

Just now the bloke who sits next to me exclaimed ‘I fucking hate work’ with some rancour. To which the bloke opposite him responded ‘I hate myself’… Golly I thought, those are heavy sentiments for a Tuesday afternoon. That was until my brain had unscrambled the message and twigged that the first one had said ‘I fucking hate Word’ and the other ‘I hate Excel’!

He’s behind you

January 15th, 2010
Widow Twanky honks her horn at the Hackney Empire

Widow Twankey honks her horn at the Hackney Empire

What with the snow – or the ice – becoming annoying and the darkness of January grinding its way towards its lowest point on Blue Monday, it’s time for a little warmth and colour. That is, it’s really time for pantomime. So, last week the lovely Autumn booked us tickets to Aladdin at the Hackney Empire.

Since discovering last year that my great-grandfather was a scene painter in Victorian panto, I have a new found interest in the form, but I’ve also never quite grown out of it either. If you are off to see a pantomime this winter it seems that the Hackney panto is the one to see, even the sceptical (and slightly snooty) Telegraph reviewer left walking on air.

It’s easy to see why the reviews have been so good – from the introduction by the panto camel to the final rapturous bows – this is a desert-hot blast of energy and good humour. Alongside our cheery Aladdin (Anna Jane Casey) the other characters are as bright and bold as Dalston Market oranges. There’s definitely a Hackney influence: the Empress of China (Tameka Empson) has taken on a very ‘strident’ African form, complete with village proverbs, and the Genii of the Lamp (Kat B) seems to think it’s 4am in a bashment. Even the catch phrase of the Genii of the Ring (Josephine Melville) is “You get me though?”

Perhaps it’s because most of my panto going was done a while ago, but the Widow Twankey of The Wash-Me-Nicks Laundry seems to be more gregarious than ever. Wearing seven elaborate outfits, Clive Rowe is simply splendid. He’s as wide as a washing machine, with a voice as big as a bus that he left me wanting a him to finish the snatches of songs he sings. Luckily, with comic timing set in Greenwich, there wasn’t time to dwell on it.

If you thought that panto was for youngsters then you’d be wrong: we were sitting behind a row of oldsters. Who wouldn’t appreciate a dance routine featuring mummies from the tomb, or cart-wheeling pandas. All this happens on a backdrop of dazzling sets that flick past at a bewildering speed. The dragon that takes Aladdin from the Peking suburb of Ha-Ka-Ney to Arabia is a particular wonder of ingenuity. The set designers even built a palace just for the final bows. I’m sure Oscar Barrett and John P Barrett would approve.

Despite the jollity of the show, there is a sinister, sorrowful cloud that hangs over the proceedings. This is nothing to do with Abanazer the magician who’s the baddie, and everything to do with the financial problems that threaten to close the theatre. Last summer the Empire almost shut for good and when the panto finishes at the beginning of February, they are having a ‘rethink’ on their artistic direction. Roland Muldoon, a former chief executive and artistic director, believes the changes will move away from the theatre’s ‘black’ programming agenda. This suggests that the management thinks that this agenda is not bringing in the crowds. Whatever is behind these financial problems, this year’s Aladdin is not entirely ‘white’, but it left the audience entirely satisfied, black or white. Book your tickets now.

Happy Christmas to everyone

December 24th, 2009
Christmas garland, St Bartholemew the Great, London

Christmas garland, St Bartholemew the Great, London

Peace on earth, and good will to all … hopefully